I do not consider myself a very bold person. Someone who STANDS out in a crowd. Or someone people take notice of. not immediately anyway. After some time of getting to know me, or within my close circles, this may be true, but not right off the bat. I don’t think that this is a bad thing either.
I am not worried about how many people notice me or how many people know who i am.
What I am concerned about is this..
That the people who do know me, and the people who’s lives i am involved with would consider me someone who always did my best to do what God wanted me to do.
This has not always been my goal, I’ve made many mistakes in my past that I do regret. I’ve made decisions that did not honor God, and I’ve learned from these things.
There have been times where I’ve lost sight of this goal and made mistakes, but was convicted and did my best to take responsibility and fix those mistakes. There have been times where I have been selfish and did not make the hard decisions. I regret these times the most because being like christ means always being selfless…
In the future there will be times where I will know that I need Gods forgiveness, and know that i already have it.
But no matter what happens, I want to always come back to the main point by doing what God wants me to do. NOT to do what I want to. hopefully more times than not, what I want to do will line up with what he wants me to do… but if it does not line up, I want to strive to pick His will over anything else.
Romans 12:1+2 have been really strong verses in my life over the past semester and into the summer. It says this :
“I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”
finding out what worship really is…
and finding out what God’s will is…
it is incredibly simple, but it is so incredibly hard.
its incredibly hard but it is essential for us to be able to do what God wants, and to truly worship him. We just need to give up what we want, sacrifice our desires, and spend time being transformed by what’s in his words.
some of you may already know, but I have made a really big decision recently… one that requires me to give up what is comfortable. Give up what I want, what i desire. over time this decision became what i desire, but it was not easy. I am incredibly scared of the future. I am scared about a lot of things… I am working on not being scared, but its hard. Either way, I am going to close my eyes and trust God. Some people think I’m reckless. That I am not making the “wise” decision (as if they knew what was wise apart form knowing what God wants).
I know I am doing my best to do what God wants me to do, and that gives me so much comfort, its unbelievable.
